oh god..!!i am going crazy and nuts.I think i seriously need a breathing space really badly.i am not sure how i am going to express all my feelings into words and do not know how to say it out to people but i really need a breathing space.i feel that i am already suffocating and i really want to let it all out, let all my fustrations and anger all out but i just cannot do it.i don't even know how to let it all out and solve it, let it be family or job.maybe i should really sit down and think of what i should seriously do right now at this moment but i am really sick and tired of all these things that are happening to me but i just cannot get things right now at this moment.i am in no mood to think of how to solve these problems too, people who know me always say that i am cheerful,talkative and approachable.but beneath all that i am actually covering all my sadness as i am afraid to show others.i do not want to show other people when i am actually sad instead of happy.i do not want to trouble them of all my troubles as some of them already have their troubles and problems that are waiting for them to solve and i can only keep them all inside my heart.i want to shout out loud and i want to scream to my heart's content as screaming will actually makes me forget all my troubles for a while but i simply just could not do that as i am so busy with all the work and problems that are bothering me so i just cannot find time to go to some places to scream.instead of screaming to forget all my troubles, i really feel like crying now and sometimes i feel that i am really useless as a person.i think i am going to break down one of these days.tired.tired.tired of these problems.

i have just started working just yesterday and i felt that working really sucks.the people there are maybe sometimes quite dao maybe as they are busy most of the times but working there as a temp just lakes me feel so stressed.it has just been two days only and i am feeling so stressed already.there is also another temp staff who has just joined in on monday and she just told mi n e 2 other temps that she will be leaving together with another another temp staff next friday.i am just hoping that she will change her mind and tell me tomorrow that she will not be leaving till the end of next month.hur hur...anywae, today i just know 2 other temp staff and they are quite friendly but one of them will be leaving nxt fri and the other one will be leaving on the 15 of next month and i would have no company for the next 10 daes for next month as i will be leaving at the end of next month which is two weeks before the actual leaving of the job.hmm...this is not yet confirmed but it will most likely be the case.i am just hoping now that the another temp staff will not be leaving till the end of next month or new temp staff that comes into the company will just be nice and friendly and will get along with me.i agm going crazy and nuts.argh...anyway, i will try to perserve till the end of next month for the stuff that i want to buy...hur hur...

I will be starting to work tml and i am feeling kind of nervous as it has been a few mths since i just last worked...i am also slacking at home for the whole day watching youtube...hahas...i had been spending time watchin youtube for a few hours for the past week and had also been rotting at home...tomorrow will be a brand new day and hope it will just turned out fine.Hope the people over there will be just like the same as income.hahas...i think i better work hard for this 2 upcoming months to earn $$$ and then will just buy the things that i plan to buy with, during this 2 months.

21st aug'06
today i went to my sis sch to take the o-level oral exam and the reading passage is not difficult as i had came across those words before but i was scared that i read the passage in mono-tone and did not express many feelings.For the picture discription, i could not think of many points but i just crapped my way through and wad eva point that came into my mind, i just speak out.For the conversation topic, i also crapped all the way and i think i had said so much rubbish till 1 of the examiner kept on smiling at me.for both the conversation topic and picture discription is about old folks.but i think this time round for the oral, it was okay and not too badly done.hope that oral can pull up some of my english marks and jia you for the remaining papers for eng which is in beginning of nov.yea..this time i must go well-prepared for the o-levels and not like last yr and for the eng oral where i just screwed up abit.

Have you ever wonder why the friends by your side came into your life..?? Someone once told me that all the people who came from different schools and have different personalities and became your friens beacause of the word "fate"...u got to know different friens because you all have fate...and mayb tat's true...i was so sad when i gotten my o-lvl results back as i could not got into the business course that i badly wanted and it's had been my wish for a long tym...but come to think of it...if i had nt had those results for o-lvl...mayb i would not have chosen IT and i would nt hav known my class peeps...n mayb i would nt have chosen NP as my choice too...and if i had gotten into biz course...the friens tat i had known may nt b lyk my class peeps too and my life would not have been the same too..my class peeps may talk rubbish at all tyms and may joke around but they are all fun peeps...hahas...hmm...enough of those thinkings already...since i went to IT..so study harder for the modules so that i will not have any more regrets...and i juz wanna make full use of my life and join a cca that i like and treasure all of my friens that i have right now...yea...jia you..

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i have fallen in love with this song...
感情线 by 183 club =)



here are the lyrics for the song...




我想我已开始有点疑惑 好像被他说中些什么
难道已经没有别的选择 只能乖乖的束手就策
难过的是我们做了选择 是对是错也没把握
如果要我放手才能获得 为何在我心中 有舍不得
看着你要走 还装着笑容 掩饰的脆弱要撑多久
如果现在开口 如何挽留 感情这条线 注定只能这么远
不敢想信已经来到终点 想你爱他必定多一些
我们之间不可能再回到从前 我还傻傻画着幸福线
看着你走远 还继续装笑脸 掩饰折磨我能撑多久
如果现在开口 怎么挽留 感情这条线 注定无法延长一点
你已不在 而我何时才清醒 想信一切都是命
不曾放弃你 我不会说什么 默默的承受
像个男子汗
We will carry on, knowing there were words I've
never said baby
Let the words remain unsaid...
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I hav found a job (:

hahas...so happy tat i hav found a job...finally...can work n earn $$$ n e workin place ish at bedok..happy sia...yea...all my wishlists can be fulfilled ord...hahas..will b startin work on fri bahx..nt too sure lolx...anywae..happy happy happy..muz go enjoy tis few daes first before startin work...LOL...

holidaes r here again..yea..happy..crazy..mad..LOL..hav been slackin at hm tis few daes watchin youtube n tv serials n accompanying my dog..hahas...will b gg for job interview ltr at e agency n hope i can gt a job real soon..can do tons n tons of things wen i gt my first pay..LOL..miss gg for a shoppin spree wif joyce too..it has been so long since we last met n went on a shopping spree..den b sides working..tis ish oso e tym to catch up wif friens..hav nt been seein oth my sec n pri sch friens..yea..will b gg to watch a movie ltr wif vina at ps..stayin at hm ish so sian..stop here ord lolx..hope will gt a job real soon..yea..real soon...

yea...final sem test had finished ytd n its holis again..happy gurl...hahas...yea...gotta find job mayb soon coz mayb gt lobang...hmm...nt too sure oso n wanna buy ipod nano 4Gb ...n go shopping @ thailand or malaysia...LOL...